Sometimes I surprise myself and this is one of those times. After teetering on the brink of collapse I made it to the end of the week. After having so many tough days in a row, I finally had a good one yesterday and I think today will be good as well. I am really and truly surprised that I made it to Friday and fought off the worst of the depression. There were two or three days where I thought I would need to go to the emergency department at the local hospital but I made it, I freaking did it.
This morning I have my virtual orientation with Faithful Friends, a local no-kill animal shelter, to be one of their semi-professional cat wranglers. Well, in all honesty I am looking forward to being a catboy as I do not mind cleaning cages and playing with, and socializing, our feline companions. But seriously, the act of caring for a cat brings me a lot of peace that I otherwise have difficulty finding. I enjoy giving love to the cats and feeling and hearing their purrs is relaxing. There has been some research to show that the audio frequency at which a cat purrs reduces blood pressure in humans and helps trigger biochemical changes relaxing us as well.
I am also really looking forward to my first in-person therapy session in about 6 months. My therapist really had to quarantine himself because of his wife’s mother and father being part of the high risk population. Therapy over Zoom is not the same thing as it is person to person. I find that it is more stifling over Zoom and less freeing. For the lack of a better expression, it feels forced and I do not always know or remember what to say. I am encouraged that I will have some positive things to say this time, not just all negative.