So I think I have probably found love again. It’s been a very long time but I think I am in love with Denisse, the girl that I was connected with through my friend Jim. I’ve grown to really care for her even though I haven’t met her in real life. She’s pretty much what I’ve been looking for in a person: she’s kind, compassionate, and empathetic. She understands mental illness and knows that it is not the person’s fault for having one. She is an all around good person.
The only problem is that she lives in Hanover, PA and I live in Pike Creek, DE; neither of us have a car. Poverty is such a pain in the ass. Nobody should go without in the wealthiest nation in history. Yet somehow so many go without. Anyways, I digress. We’re talking about finding housing for her in Delaware and I hope it can happen soon but I know there might be a wait.
I know one thing is for certain. I want to be close to her; to be able to rub her back and shoulders. I want to make her feel special and good. It’s like I’ve written before, I feel like a teenager in love and it’s an amazing fucking feeling. I hope that it keeps up and gets stronger. It really lifts me out of depression. Everything feels so real and good. I cannot wait for the opportunity to sleep with her. That will be even more amazing given I feel like I connect with Denisse’s personality so deeply.
In some ways I am scared of putting my heart out there but I’ve got to. I’ve absolutely got to. Just throw caution to the wind and here goes nothing. I want to be with her everywhere.