It has been more than a week since I have posted anything and I really feel the need to write something because I am absolutely frustrated. The Cisco Certified Network Associate IT certification course that I am enrolled in is not going as well as expected. I am learning how to work on the networking equipment and I can do the troubleshooting. However I am just not fast enough at it to do well on the exams. It takes me time to analyze the data presented to me, come to a conclusion, implement the solution, and test.
Also, in an attempt to trip students up, Cisco asks questions in convoluted ways. This does not really test someone’s true ability in the real world. I am not a good standardized test taker yet I did very well in college. The SAT was a totally inaccurate predictor of how I would do in college. I am able to tutor my fellow students in router and switch troubleshooting and my knowledge foundation is very strong. What does someone like me whom does not test well do? It does not help that I am disabled. Cisco apparently hates disabled people because all they do is offer accommodations for people with physical disabilities. What about for people like myself whom are Autistic and might benefit from an un-timed test?
So all of this has made me feel frustrated and terribly depressed because the two certification exams are going to be my roadblock. I guess for people like me there are things like Pass Leader. Pass Leader basically pays people to take the exams, memorize the questions, and offers these brain dumps for sale. Maybe my time is better spent on memorizing questions and answers and spend class time understanding the equipment.
If Cisco wants to make their exams hard and pressure-prone, then I am fine with cheating by using a company like Pass Leader. Mathematically, two negatives equal a positive so I am fine with doing an end-run around the blockade. It’s sad that it has come to this. I have so much riding on obtaining this certification because the alternative is grinding poverty and little to no future. I have the skills and technical acumen to work in Information Technology but I have been out of it for so long that my resume goes in the digital trash can.
I am living in grinding poverty right now. I would even settle for stable poverty if that would be possible. However, public assistance in the United States is rapidly going away; thanks given to all of the politicians that have the Libertarian ideology. Cisco was supposed to be my great hope for re-entering the Information Technology workforce but it’s rapidly diminishing. I am starting to believe that the best I would be able to hope for is being a security guard.
Once you experience severe failure and setback in a Capitalist society with very few forms of assistance, the road to recovery is full of sinkholes, traps, and gotchas. Capitalism, at least in the United States, tends to doubly punish failure. Once you have met with failure, you’re deemed unworthy. It’s very unforgiving; especially for people like myself that suffer from mental illness. Being seen as a second class citizen makes things difficult. There are days that I feel destined for life in a group home.