{"id":868,"date":"2026-05-24T20:00:55","date_gmt":"2026-05-25T00:00:55","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/goblackcat.com\/?p=868"},"modified":"2026-05-24T20:00:55","modified_gmt":"2026-05-25T00:00:55","slug":"mourning-the-loss-of-a-dream","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/goblackcat.com\/wordpress\/2026\/05\/24\/mourning-the-loss-of-a-dream\/","title":{"rendered":"Mourning The Loss of a Dream"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I\u2019m mourning the loss of my dream to one day have land in the mountains. I think I have come to the sad realization that I won\u2019t be climbing out of poverty. I\u2019m thinking the coming years are only going to be increasingly difficult. I fear that my life is going to be one of survival. Perhaps I\u2019ve accepted this. But that doesn\u2019t mean I cannot create new and very practical dreams. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Since my prescriber has added Abilify to my regimen, I\u2019m doing mentally better. Instead of feeling like I could break down and cry, I feel like I honestly could create new dreams that will be every bit as good and more achievable. I wonder what the coming days will bring. I know I\u2019ll be in survival mode for a while because the economy is bad. I\u2019m fortunate enough to even have this low end job. Service jobs are even hard to get!<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">For the time being, I\u2019m trying to live in the present, go to work, and do what I love which is working on my home lab. I\u2019m not going to think more than a few days ahead. This is still living in the present. I feel good when given a good mental challenge and task.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">The next mission is to setup a private cloud with Nextcloud!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I\u2019m mourning the loss of my dream to one day have land in the mountains. I think I have come to the sad realization that I won\u2019t be climbing out of poverty. I\u2019m thinking the coming years are only going to be increasingly difficult. I fear that my life is going to be one of [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[2,5],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-868","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-mental-health","category-personal"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/goblackcat.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/868","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/goblackcat.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/goblackcat.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/goblackcat.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/goblackcat.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=868"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/goblackcat.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/868\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/goblackcat.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=868"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/goblackcat.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=868"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/goblackcat.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=868"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}