Black Cat Blog

Thoughts, Stories, and Ideas

Racing Thoughts This Morning

So I am having racing thoughts this morning as a lot is happening. I am really concerned about my girlfriend, Denisse. I am worried about her future as well as mine. We have to make a trip back up into Pennsylvania to get a letter from the Department of Human Services stopping her benefits so we can get benefits started in Delaware. The unknown variable is how long it will take Delaware’s Department of Health and Social Services to get benefits started for her. I am also worried that she might end up completely homeless here in Delaware; without even a roof over her head. So my brain is going a million and a half miles per hour.

It is so needlessly difficult being poor (or for that matter, even working class) in the United States. The United States punishes people for being impoverished, disabled, and being both. It absolutely sickens me. I just hope that I can get services for Denisse before the clock runs out on her motel room because I fear I cannot afford to put her up for much longer. I need Delaware’s Department of Health and Social Services to be fast and charitable and I have some hope that they will be. But if they aren’t, I fear Denisse may end up on the streets. I am scrambling to think of ways to avoid this because she won’t last a day on living on the streets.

I am scared for her but I must not show this fear to her because I must be her rock during these difficult times. I took on this personal commitment to her and I fully intend to see it through. I am afraid of failing her. I am pulling out as many stops as I can to help her and I am going to continue to try and think of solutions but I am almost out of ideas. I would have her stay with me but I cannot risk my own housing situation. I am so angry at the country I live in. Things are just so incredibly unfair! I really wish I could do more. Why is it that people like me who have the least amount to give often give the most!?