While this morning was very challenging from both an autistic and mental health standpoint, I can honestly say that I came out of this one surprisingly strong. I had a meltdown because I was way overstimulated. In previous times, I think this might have lead to me shutting down completely. Instead, I relied on some coping skills and I am proud of myself for doing better.
I did not know when I was headed to pick up my Uber rental car so that I can earn money on the platform, that I would have to pay in full for my first week’s rental. After that, they deduct your fares until you hit the weekly cost. So naturally I had spent time and money on getting to the rental location which is not exactly nearby. The meltdown came on while I was at the rental location but I managed to hold it together. Of course I am exhausted now.
I don’t know how I avoided a serious mental health collapse but I did it. I thought at one point I was afraid that I’d need emergency help. But damn if I did not do what had to be done. I did it and I am safe. So if there is a silver lining to this cloud, I know that I have more fortitude than I even I could’ve guessed I had.
I was hoping to get a few administrative things done with the downtime I have but it’s just not going to happen and that is perfectly okay. For now, it will simply be incumbent on me to relax and do some mindless things.
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