I am absolutely fucking angry. I am fit to be tied and I don’t use bad language too often but this is just exactly how I feel. I am so angry that I have an acid pit in my stomach and I did not sleep well last night. I absolutely hate my security guard job. I hate everything about it but it pays well and I have no other choice but to slave away. At least I am not alone and there are other people that hate their jobs. I am so ready to set up a scam or something to get money. People that lead law abiding lives rarely get ahead. It’s the hustlers that make it because they’re willing to do what I’ve been indoctrinated not to.

I have a co-worker that I thoroughly despise. I caught her changing my entries in our team’s daily activity report. I guess last night I grew a pair and said quietly while enunciating my words, “Do not ever edit any of my entries.” Then I spun around on my heal and walked out. I did not even give her an opportunity to say anything. Thankfully, she is not well-loved and nothing will become of it but I said my piece. Maybe I am getting a little bit racist in my old age too. I don’t know anymore. Okay, more like I have a barrel full of anger.

I am so angry that I am motivated to find a new job – yet again. I hate changing employers but this is getting ridiculous. I feel like I just can’t win. The policies change day to day and the communication is very poor. I feel like I am ready to snap so that’s how I know I’ve got to get out of this. Do I hang in there a little bit more and hope to transfer to a different location on the site that I am assigned to guard? Cooler heads always prevail and I know this. But my head is anything but cool. It’s times like these that I get why people snap. A man can only take so much.